A Fashion (Mis)Statement

Land's End ought to make a disclaimer before selling their bright yellow down vests. Perhaps a discrete AVOID WEARING IN AUSTRIA might be enough. Here I was on a lovely Sunday afternoon celebrating a wonderful Austrian festival known as Almabtrieb. It's a “Let's herd the cows down from the mountain pastures of the Alps (where they have spent the summer) to the warmer stables in our village (where they will spend the winter) and decorate them with flower garlands and have a grand cow parade" kind of thing. There were local brass bands performing, children playing on hay bales, women in dirndls serving beer in gigantic steins, local artisans selling their wares, lots of vendors offering delicious local foods, and the cows hiding their excitement about returning to village life. The most marvelous thing I saw was a group of about nine teenage boys, around 14 or 16 years old, gather onstage and perform an IMPROMPTU folk dance. They wore lederhosen, the traditional Bavarian/Austrian men's costume, and the boys were accompanied in their stomping and clapping and hopping by a friend playing an accordion. It was one of the coolest performances I have ever seen.

But my enthusiasm was short-lived when I figured out why people were staring at me. It wasn't because I was taking pictures or tapping my foot to the music or speaking English or eating with my fork in the wrong hand. Or maybe it was. But I suspect it was the vest. The one I thought looked pretty jaunty with my black corduroy pants and black turtleneck. But my fashion sense wasn't foremost in the minds of that gathering in Russbach, Austria. They were all wondering if I'd had an auto emergency, because that is when they wear their yellow vests. You know, the vests mandated by Austrian law to be carried in the front seat of EVERY vehicle?  Right.  Those yellow vests.